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We had an employee check your property today and he found that there was grass in your yard. That is a $57 fee for today. $7 for the photo and $50 for the grass. Prior you had a balance of $310.

As I am sure that most or you are aware of the HOA (Homeowners Association), this is what I was informed of earlier today… So let’s rewind to two days ago…

*BUZZ* Incoming Text from Property Owner:

I got a phone call from the HOA regarding your property. There is a $310 balance. Please take care of this by the end of the week. Thx.

PSHT! I don’t know what for because nobody from the HOA has ever notified me of any issues… Which mind you, they are supposed to notify you every time there is an issue. So, I call the HOA – complete gaggle of idiots on the phone that make NO SENSE – They inform my of a million different dates from August last year through December of last year. As they continue reading the charges that are rapidly adding up, this individual is reading off a million late fees (which might not have been there if I knew about this when it was a $7 bill).

By the end of this phone call, she sends me a waiver form via email, as well as a tenant form because apparently the HOA showed that this was a vacant resident (I have lived here for three years…) So I fill out the retarded form and email it back.

Today –> I call the HOA Office to check the status of the waiver for the past charges and what happens!?!?!? OH FREAKIN’ BILL!! Who the hell is Bill? Don’t you know this female informs me that there is another $57 charge added to my account from today regarding my front yard having GRASS!! I was shocked! WHAT!?! I have NO grass… nothing even GREEN! ALL FREAKIN’ ROCKS (Thank you AZ)… This female is claiming that “Bill” took pictures < SEND THEM TO ME CAUSE YOUR MAN IS BLIND! >

I then inform her that I am going to take pictures of my yard as is and email them to her for view. I don’t see any miniature golf course anywhere around here!! On the funny side – I have yet to receive her email with these pictures that “Bill” took. Nor have they called me back.

So my question is why on Earth would anyone want to live in an HOA property. Seriously!?! People pay $250 a month just so that these F*CK*RS can judge our yards and make up some random BS to charge you more money for nothing… HA! Don’t you know this female asked me for my Debit Card Number to put the bill on Auto-Pay… Yeah – Ummmm NOOOOO – That’s not going to happen! Could you imagine checking your bank account and you are randomly missing $400 and you have to fight to get your money back and then IF you get it back, it is going to take another 3-5 business days to get your money into your account… yeah I have other bills that need to get paid before a BS made-up bill that you decided to issue without proof and without notification.

Last, but not least – let me inform you of this – We just had all of the yard work done last Saturday. So the irony of them pulling this stunt when our yard is looking at its best …. ridiculous!! They could have at least lied and made it out to be some other day that I could not recall what precisely my yard looked like at that given time – so they literally just put their foot in their mouth by providing information about grass in my yard today. That just proves to me that I can not trust the fees and late fees that have already been assigned on my account for last year!

How many of you out there have been played by the HOA? Does this happen in other states? Give us a shout out if you live in an area with a GOOD HOA SERVICE!!!

Sh*t, with as much money as I pay them, they should have someone out here cleaning my yard and providing maintenance!